Sunday, October 5, 2008

Number 2?

I have always wanted 2 kids by the time I was 30. In the last few weeks I realized that I am trucking toward 30 pretty fast. I will be 29 in a couple a months. This of course makes me feel super old. It didn't help anything that my hs reunion just happened. I have an appointment with a RE next month. My PCOS has made getting pregnant without help impossible. I am so ready to be pregnant again, but at the same time, I am terrified. There were so many times that I just felt like I could not go on when I was TTC Noah. For those of you who have never dealt with this, let me explain the process. I would first start with prometrium to make my cycle start (sorry if that is total TMI). Then I would take Clomid (with the strength getting higher each month) for days 3-9 of my cycle. Now let me explain something about Clomid. I am surprised I got pregnant at all, b/c clomid can make you into a total *itch. (even more so than I usually am :) ) It makes you moody and emotional and downright evil. Then, you get to start a baby dance ;) schedule (not fun). Anyway around day 21, you go in for blood work (this is when I knew that I must really want a baby b/c I am terrified of needles). Then after a day or two, you get a phone call telling you if you ovulated or not. For 6 months (they were wrong once), I was told that the medicine didn't work. I would leave the office or hang up the phone in tears. Then the process starts all over again. This is very frustrating especially when you see high school girls getting pregnant with no problem. Anyway, we are now about to embark on this journey again with all of this knowledge hanging over our head. As well as the fear of my preeclampsia coming back. Toby is understandably not ready. He remembers! Anyway, I am ready to go and hear what the doctor has to say, and hopefully, I will have 2 kids by the time I am 30!

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